When I ask women what they struggle with most, they say consistency with exercise and diet tops the list. This inconsistency often stems from several unhelpful and limiting underlying patterns of behaviour. I’d like to talk about the four of them and I encourage you to feel into which one describes you and your motivations to look after yourself better.
The Motivated Starter
She is a motivated starter who begins strong, motivated, and determined, but it doesn’t last long. Perhaps she begins a strict low-carb diet or joins an intense fitness challenge, seeing some initial success. However, when she attends a social event or gets stressed or bored, her motivation dwindles. She gives in to cravings for comfort foods like chocolate or pasta, and the diet gets thrown out the window. The weight returns, and she finds herself looking in the mirror, fed up. And after some time, she starts this cycle over again. This cycle is exhausting and disheartening, but it’s a pattern that is so common.
The High Achiever
She’s a high achiever who sets unreasonable and unattainable goals for herself. She believes in the 100% rule. Meaning the only diet that will work for her is a really strict one. And the best, most effective workout is one involving lots of cardio. Only then will she see results. For example, she might start a regimen that includes cutting out all sugars and carbs and walking 15,000 steps every day. The second she slips up or does not perform to her 100% rule, perhaps by eating a piece of bread at dinner or missing out on some steps due to a busy schedule, she feels all out of sorts. Overwhelmed, defeated, and guilty. In comes all those negative thoughts and she’s left feeling bad about herself- downhearted and overwhelmed with guilt and negative self-talk. This leads to an endless cycle of self-criticism that erodes her motivation. And the only thing that will get her back on track is to set her high perfectionist goals again so she feels in control. But guess what, it’s not long till the cycle of despair kicks in once more.
The Hesitant Planner
She finds herself procrastinating and constantly putting things off. Saying she’ll do such and such but never actually get to the start line. Or if she does, she doesn’t hear the starting gun. Maybe she’s been struggling with her health and confidence and has set a goal to embark on a weight-loss journey. Perhaps she tells herself she’ll start next Monday, after the holidays, or once she has more free time. The fear of failure or feeling overwhelmed by the sheer magnitude of the changes needed often paralyses her into inaction. This leads to months or even years passing by without making significant progress toward her health goals.
The Selfless Caregiver
She puts everyone else’s needs before her own. Whether it’s taking care of her family, supporting friends, or managing work responsibilities, her health and well-being often take a back seat. For example, she might skip her morning workout to help her grandchildren get ready for school, or she might opt for a convenient but unhealthy takeaway because she’s too tired to cook a nutritious meal after a long day of caring for an elderly parent. This leaves little time and energy for maintaining consistent healthy habits, and her own health deteriorates as a result.
There is some good news
Whether you’re a Motivated Starter, a High Achiever, a Hesitant Planner or a Selfless Caregiver, the core issue remains the same: a lack of a clear, sustainable direction and a vague understanding of why self-care is important.
Once you have a clear, sustainable, and personalised plan and a sense of your deeper motivations, you’re more likely to have success. To be consistent with exercise and healthy eating.
Having a clear plan- what to do, when to do it, and how to do it is essential.
What to eat, when to eat and even how to eat.
How to exercise, what to do and when to do it.
You need to have this mapped out for you to create healthy habits and stick with them for life.
And why do you want to look after yourself better, well that is equally important.
I mean the deeper reasons you want to be fitter, stronger, more active, confident and switched-on.
Not just losing weight, being more toned or looking good in clothes. Now don’t get me wrong, these are crucial motivators.
But what will make the real sustainable difference is getting down to the nitty-gritty of it all.
For you, maybe that is about keeping your independence rather than being a burden to your family. Feel useful and involved with others.
Maybe it’s about being able to play with your grandchildren or meeting up with your friends for a long walk for many years to come.
Maybe it’s about being fit and strong enough so you enjoy travelling when you retire.
These deeper reflections go a long way to helping you establish consistent healthy habits for life.